From carrots as tekiteki to championing change in Tonga

Diamond Vea’s story is one of courage, creativity, and resilience.

Growing up in Mataika, Tongatapu as the child of two Anglican priests, Diamond faced immense challenges as a young transgender person in the Pacific.

From performing tauolunga (Tongan ladies dance) at age three with a carrot as a makeshift tekiteki (traditional headpiece), to battling societal expectations and inner struggles, her path has been anything but easy.

Yet, through love, perseverance, and a drive to succeed, Diamond rose above the challenges.

Today, she is not only the Communications Officer and Project Assistant at the Tonga Leitis Association, but also an entrepreneur and co-founder of Ke Tau Talanoa podcast.

Her journey from being Tonga’s first transgender journalist to a leader inspiring the next generation of leitis is a testament to her strength.

Diamond’s message is clear: “Believe in yourself and go earn your title.” 

By turning pain into power and success into advocacy, she continues to carve spaces of visibility and hope for LGBTQI+ youth in Tonga and across the Pacific.

Here's Diamond’s story through Q&A:

When did you realise you were different and unique?

I can still recall the stories my parents and relatives love to share about me when I was just three-years-old. I would perform the Tongan ladies’ tauolunga (dance), and whenever I couldn’t find a proper tekiteki (traditional headpiece), I would improvise with whatever I could find. My dad often played his guitar and sang Teu Fakatulou, while I danced proudly. Sometimes, he even took me to visit relatives so I could perform, and they would encourage me with fakapale (gifts, usually money). One funny memory was the time I couldn’t find a headpiece, so I grabbed a carrot, held it against my head with one hand, and danced as if it were a real tekiteki. From a very young age, I was naturally feminine. By the time I was five, I already noticed I was drawn to women’s clothing, music, dance, and even found boys attractive, my very first crush being Devon Sawa, who played the human form of Casper in Casper the Friendly Ghost. As I grew, my creativity only expanded. I loved designing dance props, organising events, decorating spaces, and coming up with new ideas to bring people together. Creativity and expression have always been a part of who I am.

How difficult was it growing up as an LGBTQI person?

As an only child and a transgender person, growing up was very challenging, especially with both my parents serving as priests in the Anglican church. The hardest part was battling my own inner thoughts; how I internalised people’s comments, including those from family members who told me to “man up,” marry a wife, and have children to carry on my father’s legacy. Being a priest’s child also came with heavy expectations from the community, where my identity was often seen as conflicting with christian beliefs. This created a deep mental struggle for me. At times, I even questioned God and asked, “Why me?” I wrestled with suicidal thoughts, but through it all, my parents’ love and support gave me the courage to continue my journey and stay true to myself.

What challenges did you face as a young LGBTQI person growing up in the Pacific?

One of the biggest challenges was not being recognised for my preferred gender. People often mistook me for a cisgender woman because of my appearance, which made me feel uncomfortable and shy about showing who I really was. I also struggled to find safe spaces where I could be acknowledged, especially in public meetings and conferences. Many times, I felt excluded from regional spaces and initiatives simply because of my gender identity.

How did you react to these challenges - how did you feel about them, and how did it affect you?These challenges were painful, but over time, I chose to use them as motivation. Instead of letting them break me, they pushed me to become stronger and more resilient. I realised that sitting back and dwelling on the hurt wouldn’t help me grow. To truly overcome, I needed to face those struggles head-on, and that process shaped me into a tougher and more determined person.

How were you treated at home, by your family, in public, at school, etc.?

At home, I was fortunate to be treated with love and acceptance. In public and at school, there were occasional challenges; some people laughed, teased, or called me names. At times, I also felt excluded because of my gender identity, and, surprisingly, even within my own leiti community, I sometimes faced negativity or was put down. However, I wouldn’t say I was heavily bullied overall. What kept me strong was focusing on the love and support I consistently received, which gave me the courage to rise above those moments and keep moving forward.

How did you overcome these challenges?

I learned that success is one of the most powerful ways to shift people’s perceptions. Excelling academically and becoming head prefect in high school, pursuing further education, and building a career, all of these helped me earn respect. When people see you succeed, contribute, and achieve, they no longer have room to look down on you. I built a name for myself, and with that came a sense of pride and empowerment.

What inspired you to become the person you are today?

While many are inspired by others, I can honestly say I inspired myself. Looking back at everything I’ve endured and the challenges I overcame, I continue to use my journey as my source of strength. My life hasn’t been easy; it has been a rollercoaster, but I pushed through, and every day I remind myself to become better, stronger, and an inspiration for others.

What sets you apart from others?

I don’t see myself as “different” from others; we all walk different paths, face unique struggles, and hold our own intersections of identity. What makes my journey meaningful is the hope that by sharing it, I can inspire others to pursue the life they dream of no matter the challenges.

When you look back at your journey, what do you see?

I see a young warrior, much like Moana sailing beyond the reef to restore the heart of Te Fiti. My journey from school to becoming the first transgender journalist in Tonga and was accepted for I preferred to be and now serving as the Communications Officer for the Tonga Leitis Association while also pursuing entrepreneurship; has been full of challenges but also triumphs. Every step has been worth it, and I’m proud of how far I’ve come, not just for myself but for the young leitis I hope to inspire.

What are your plans for the future?

I have many dreams, but ultimately, I believe God’s plan for me is greater than anything I can imagine. For now, my focus is on serving the LGBTIQ+ community in Tonga, empowering younger leitis to step up as leaders, and continuing to grow in my advocacy work. I also want to expand my small business to ensure financial stability, so I can support myself and care for my aging parents, who mean everything to me.

What’s your message to other LGBTQI individuals who are facing similar challenges?

“Believe in yourself and go earn your title.” Too often, we let others’ hurtful words and discrimination weigh us down, trapping us in a prison of sadness and self-doubt. Instead, we should use those experiences as bricks to build our own empire. Turn pain into strength and never let anyone define your worth.

What’s your message to society at large?

We need to practice empathy and respect. Everyone’s journey is different, and we can never fully understand what someone else is going through. But if we choose to put ourselves in their shoes, even for a moment, we might gain compassion. If we allow space for understanding and focus on supporting one another instead of judging, the world will be a kinder, happier place for everyone.

Blog series produced by the Pacific Sexual and Gender Diversity Network